Day 6: Ongoing, Deadline. Impossible. Praying Concrete.

I have a couple of prayer journals, but one is a journal that I write down prayer requests in and try to keep record of the answers. It is SO EXCITING to read the records of how Jesus has answered. I've noticed though that it's often the more concrete, specific prayers that I see visible answers to. I think there's such value in being specific in our prayers (not being manipulative or demanding but being humble and yet bold).

Along this line of making specific, measurable requests to Jesus, I feel like there are 3 types of prayers (I'm making this up as I go. Wink). There are 1) ongoing prayers, 2) deadline prayers, and then there are the 3) impossible prayers. :)

Ongoing prayers: These are the prayers for which we need daily answers. They may seem a little more abstract, but there can eventually be seen literal answers. An example of this type of prayer would be praying for patience towards people. I will be able to see evidence of Jesus at work as I pray for this, but I will most likely never see the prayer fully answered here on earth.

Deadline prayers: These are the prayers prayed for something with a time limit, a prayer that could be witnessed to be fully answered. This is like the prayer for the job or the prayer for enough strength for that paper that needs to be turned in five days from now. Those types of prayers. They may be prayers in the moment or for future things.

Impossible prayers: Mmm. These types of prayers fascinate me the most and get me most excited. :) These are the prayers of boldness that many of us don't offer up because we either don't know all we can ask for, and/or we're scared of being wrong in asking for it. These are the prayers that people know can't be answered on a human level. These are the prayers for the salvation of the atheist neighbor, the prayer that God would heal, the prayer that God would bring in enough money to send us to Bible school or the mission trip, the prayer that Jesus would use us to bring someone to Him in the next week. (And those may not even be the boldest of prayers. There may be a higher level of boldness out there. Smile).

Well, my goal by the end of this week: Come up with 2 deadline prayers and 2 impossible prayers. :) I'll try to share at least some of them with you, so you can be witnesses! :)

PS The "ongoing prayer" for day 5 is for "Joy." :)

Dear Jesus,
Please help me to be creative in what I pray for . . . and bold. Please help me to pray in Your will, Jesus.

And may I humbly ask for Your joy? Please fill me, Jesus. Thank You that You give me all I need. Thank You for Your forgiveness toward me today. I needed it.

I love You, Jesus. (still more love, Jesus? please? help me?)
Amen.

Day 5: Deeper than Communication

As I've begun this journey to try to figure out more about prayer and to grow deeper with Jesus, I feel like I'm a little stuck because I'm not even sure what questions I should be asking about prayer to take me deeper. This is a roadblock because I feel like one of the best ways to seek something out is to ask the right questions. Right answers are clues. Watch towers. They lift you up a little more to see a higher landscape and to point you to your destination.

Yesterday, I tried to ask the basic question. I asked a few people, "What is the purpose of prayer?" I pretty much got one response. People tied prayer with communication with God. As I'm typing this out, I wonder if that is only a very small portion of it.

Communication. As I typed that word the first time, something just clicked.

Communication.
Communion.
Uni-TY

Woah, woah, woah!

COMMUNION!!!!!!!!

That's IT! Oh, this is looking familiar! I think Ann Voskamp from A Holy Experience talked about this concept once.

Prayer is about Communing with God, about a soul-deep, spirit-connecting intimacy with the Almighty.

I love Revelations 3:20.

"Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with Me."

I wonder if this is maybe what prayer is supposed to be about, about us opening the door to our hearts, letting Jesus in, and having a meal with Him, sharing life with Him, never forgetting that He is God.

Now if this really is the case, how does that change the way we pray?

For me, this type of spirit-deep prayer invites me to just be danae . . . to come my whole, broken self to Jesus and let Him come in and know me fully. It means I can find a safety in prayer, in purposefully being with Jesus, because it's just Him and me, and He knows me and wants to share life with me. Maybe we should be picturing at least one type of prayer as coming to the dinner table to meet with Jesus. To let Him fill us and feed us and let His presence change us. Maybe?

Dear Father,

Is this really Biblical? Because I don't want to just make pretty sounding answers. What is prayer, Jesus? It seems like an answer for that should be much deeper than a one word conclusion, doesn't it? Isn't there more? Please help me to ask the right questions.

Thank You for bringing me through another day. I still have a lot of homework. It's Yours. Thank You for holding me up, for knocking on our hearts.

I love You. (please, "more love to Thee")
In Jesus' name.
Amen.

PS The prayer for Day 4 was serving. My apologies for the delay for that. I was away from my list when I wrote my blog post.

The prayer for Day 5 is for blessing. I might try to talk about that later. It's such a unique prayer!

Have a wonderful day, Loved-Of-The-Lord!

Day 4: Preparing My Heart

I woke up from about seven hours of sleep, tired and groggy. I showered and got ready for the day, grabbed the timer, and headed into my special stairwell for a fifteen minute meeting with the Creator of the Universe.

Silly danae.

And I struggled with focusing and staying awake. I didn't know what to pray for or how to pray.

But I think I could pull two things from this morning.

#1. I'm pretty sure that even if I am groggy and not fully awake and can't even think very clearly, Jesus is still happy to let me just sit and be still in His presence. He knows I need it, knows sometimes, I just need to be still.

#2. I should be constantly praying throughout the whole day, but when I set a specific amount of time to meet with Jesus, I don't necessarily have to let it be the first thing in the morning. I can give myself some time to wake up. ;) After all, how many times have I scheduled meetings with my friends right after I woke up? God is much more than my Friend; He's my Father, and He knows what a sleepy-headed daughter looks like, but I think it shows that I really want to learn from HIM if I can wake up a little before I meet with Him.

Just silly musings. What do you think?

Jesus?

Thank You so much for letting me just be danae in Your presence. For letting me just sit awhile with You, You loving me where I'm at. Please help me to do better at spending more quality time, at preparing my mind for those special moments that I have set aside for You and only You. Teach me to pray, Jesus. Please?

I love You (help me!).
In Jesus' name,
amen

Day 3: Praying with My Hands

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.
And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."
- Paul in Philippians 4:6-7

Friends! Jesus helped me make my first prayer goal today of 15 minutes before the first event of my day! (Every little victory counts, beloved. Count them!) I can't say I had any strong revelations today about prayer though, but I won't give up. There's way too much of a treasure store out there somewhere that will reveal the treasure and depth and power and healing of prayer. I'll keep looking. Help me?

One thing that I started doing occasionally this summer though was giving things over to Jesus with my hands and with prayer. As I pray, I start by holding my hands, palms out, right out in front of me, and I pray what's in my heart. I pray them into my hands.

Jesus, I don't know what to do about a home church this semester. Or do I? I really want to find a place like my old church, Jesus. I don't know how I'm going to do it.

And then I lift my arms to Jesus, extending my hands out, palms toward heaven, and my worries leave my hands and are placed in the hands of Jesus.

It's more than a mental picture to me. It's a physical, literal handing over because you see, if I really believe that God is who He says He is and that my temporary struggles are not what are eternally important, I can realize that He is big enough to LITERALLY take my worries. I don't need them. (And He Does Take Them!!!!)

And when I let go, He is the One in charge of orchestrating my life. I can trust Him to take me through it. I can feel it, friends. I can feel the way He takes my burdens. Now, sometimes I have to lift up the same things over and over, but if I trust Him to take care of it, I don't have to worry. Hallelujah.

I encourage you to try it, to use your hands to reach Heaven. It's true. Once we can present our prayers, petitions, thanksgiving to Jesus, His peace swoops in and diffuses with gentle force into our hearts and minds, protecting us. Protecting us from our own worry. Protecting us from losing our focus on Jesus.

How are you using your posture or your hands to pray?

PS The prayer for day 3 is for integrity. <3

Father in Heaven,
Would You please make me a woman of integrity? There are many corners, Jesus, where there are hidden places of compromise, of half-hearted devotion. You hate that, don't You? Thank You for working on me. Please let my heart be full of integrity, not just my actions. I love You, Jesus.

Thanks for being with me today. We made it. :) Through botany exam and work. You're so present, and I'm so glad, Jesus. :)Thank You so much for calling me to Yourself and to be on Your team. I'm so glad I am.

I love You. (but still not enough. help me!)

In Jesus' name,
amen. <3

Journey of Prayer: Day 2

"I have so much to do that I spend several hours in prayer before I am able to do it."
John Wesley

I love that quote. I love the fact that even though it doesn't feel true, I'm pretty sure it probably is. :) And it's quite relevant to this American crazyness.

It's the beginning of the week, and my first goal on this prayer journey is to set a time goal for this first week. The goal? Spend 15 minutes each day this week before Jesus in prayer. I just spent that time tonight, but for the rest of the week, I want to set a "deadline" per day. I want to have spent that 15 minutes with Jesus before my first class each day or before chapel if that's the first thing of my day. I'm doing this because sometimes, it's really easy for me to push off prayer and not make it a priority for the moment. Plus, if I can align my day with prayer, I think I'd be aligning my day right.

Plus, that 15 minutes will give me time to ask Jesus to teach me how to pray. :) I'm going to need to be praying a lot of that prayer these 31 days. :)

15 minutes isn't much. It's not hours and hours, but it's a start. Come join me?

Do you have a prayer goal for the week? A time commitment?

PS: The prayer for day 2 is for passion.

Dear Father,

You know me. You know how I can sometimes be so passionless for anything other than myself. Ouch. You know how I worship myself. Oh Jesus. Please forgive me. Bring me lower to ask for Your forgiveness.

Help me to open my hands, so You can take and give what You will. Please give passion, Jesus. Passion to love You, to obey You, to serve You, to worship You, to pray.

Reach into my gray, Jesus. Please bring fireworks of color, of passion . . . for You.

I love You. But not enough. Please teach me to love You, Lord.

In Jesus' name.
Amen.



((Picture courtesy of Reflections of Joy Photography, a photography business run by my very talented and beautiful sister, Briana. Check out her work on her Reflections of Joy Photography facebook page! She's amazing!!!))

31 Days of . . . Prayer

There's this new gig happening this month among a huge crowd of Christian blogging women who are committing to writing a blog post daily for the whole month of October on a certain topic of their choice. (You can click here to find links of several women who are accepting the challenge, and some of them have AMAZING ideas!)

Well, if you know me, you may know that I'm a sucker for new resolutions (whether for a new year, new week, new month, . . . you name it!). I also love to blog, so I'm jumping on board. (I just said that, didn't I? Committed.)

My topic of choice? Prayer. After looking at some of the other topics just now, I left feeling like this seemed kind of "common" and uncreative, but the truth is, it's so very important, and I trust that this could be extremely powerful for me, so I'm taking a leap. This may be more of a journey for me than it may be for someone reading this little space o' mine, but I welcome you to follow along, asking that you would be patient and gracious with me. I'm going to need it! Smile.

I don't totally have a plan yet as to what this will look like, though I hope it will involve me sharing different ways I'm learning to pray or different methods I find to help me remember to pray, etc. I'm excited!! I feel like this has so much potential to be a tunnel into growth for me.

Also, at the end of each post, I'll try to share a characteristic that I'll be praying for in that day. I have a praying-through-the-month list inside my closet door that I received at a Women's Conference awhile back. It gives one characteristic per day for which to pray. For Day 1, the prayer is for PURITY.

Well, I humbly thank you for reading along! I'd love to hear your insights into prayer as well. Maybe we can help each other along through this. :) Have a lovely night and a wonderful October!

Dear Father,

Thank You for loving me and giving me a love for words. Would You please speak to me and teach me as I enter this prayer journey, as I type out my words here in order to find and share creative ways to search for You? Please help me to be faithful and consistent. I need Your strength, even in the little things like blogging for 31 days. Please help me.

Jesus, here I am. Thank You that You've promised to keep working on me. Please clean me out, Jesus. Make me PURE -- like You.

In Jesus' name.
Amen.

Thank You for Blood Red

Almost all of my inner circle of friends know that occasionally, I get very blood dripping nose bleeds. Yep. Gross. The crazy, funny thing is that I get them at the most AWKWARD, CREATIVE times! Ha! :) I've gotten them in the airport when it was time to step onto the plane. I've had one in church. I get them in the shower, and in the past, I've woken up to them. I've gotten a gushing one on a date. Now THAT was funny. Definitely created a memory!! :) One I got during a convocation chapel when it was all serious, and I couldn't really get out of my chair. I got one during a New Years party. Yeah. You get the picture.

But even though they can be gross and sometimes very awkward, I'm thankful for them. They're the trigger that reminds me of Jesus. And sometimes, it's a trigger of comic relief. :)

Last week, I was sitting on a dorm room floor of one of my dear friends. I was sharing with her my grey, hard day, and she prayed, and I cried. Oh how good it feels to cry some days. And after she hugged me, and I just sat, tears falling, I wiped my nose, and . . . BLOOD!!!!!!!!! How Did You Guess?! haha :) Oh but it made me laugh. Of course. :) Of course it would come at this time. And my sweet friend was so gracious, and I hopped up and headed to the bathroom, laughing and bleeding and thankful for God's silly sense of humor. :) He is good, and I love the way He reminds me that He's here. He is. I'm so thankful of the way that He lets me cry and then lets me laugh. He is so present with us, sweet friends. And sometimes, He shows up in the funniest ways in the oddest of places, but I want to catch these moments like a little girl with a butterfly net. It's been a while since I've done a thank you post, and thanks in good part to my sister for her inspiration with her blog (http://runningtheracewithjoy.blogspot.com/ . . . worth checking out!!! Really!!!! You should do it!!), I think it's about time I counted the gifts of Jesus and said thanks.

So Jesus?

Thank You:

for the new friends I've made this year already. There are such beautiful gems going to Multnomah. (And I haven't even met 'em all yet!)

for the new job! YOU PROVIDED!!!

for skype dates with my sister and hearing she's got a plane ticket home for December and flying into an airport NEARBY!!! YES!

for the way that You totally covered all of my fears! Jesus, You've taken care of the "new's": new job, new ministry, new church. It's pretty much locked into place, yes? Hasn't always been easy, but You've answered and walked with me!

for Miss K listening to me and letting me cry (and bleed! haha), for her letting me be weak. Sometimes it just feels good to be weak and broken. To let that be okay, where you're at.

for the way my ecology teacher brought in a TURTLE! to class!!!! That was so fun.

for the way that we two laughed when he brought in that turtle as the little guy moved his little feet semi-frantically. :)

for the way that KT keeps me accountable with complaining. It's good to have a friend that will do that!

for how You give me the love and strength to love by letting go. It can be so hard, Jesus. It's a very different way for me to love but please keep filling me up with You.

for the opportunity to play Ultimate Frisbee with my home church's college group last Sunday.

for the courage and something-to-say to speak up in my World Lit class last week.

for the way Mulled Spices candles smell and how the fall leaves crunch and crinkle.

for big sunflowers. You are love.

for the way You've pointed out LIGHT to me. You are Light. Let me be a reflecting light, Jesus?

for how the elderly people clap when I play music. Kind audience.

for Bible reading homework . . . how I could finish reading 1 Samuel twice last night/this morning. :)

for sweet sisters' notes in my mailbox. for such encouraging words in my Facebook inbox. for the spoken words, the "I'm so proud of you" from Miss K. We all need encouragement.

for being present, Jesus. For being KIND and GENTLE. For meeting me in this very moment and filling me up. For teaching me how to love You (please don't stop!). Thank You for nose bleeds and all the different ways You try to get my attention. You are so wonderful, LORD. You are so Loved.