I want to go home. Away. This numbness is killing me. Nightmare. I disappointed them so much, hurt them tremendously, and I can't even FEEL the wrong. I don't understand.
Oh Jesus? Are You really "by my side wherever i fall in the dead of night, whenever i call, can I please not fight Your hands that are holding me? Do You really love me? Do you really want me to know? that You love me, that You'll never let me go?" Did I disappoint You too? Do You hate me yet? I want to be held, Jesus, but am I too wrong to be touched by You? Can You hold the leper again? Please? Because I think she's dying right now.